Chapter 104

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Translator: Harry Potta

Chapter: 104

Chapter Title: Jealousy's True Name

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Others might be shocked to hear it, but Arpad Estrid had no major complaints about his life.

He'd lost his mother young, faced constant wariness from his father, and had a stepmother who watched for any chance to kill him.

Add in the uncertainty of when he might go mad and die, and anyone would feel pity for him.

It was a life filled with tragedy, after all.

That was why so many women approached him, claiming they wanted to heal his wounds.

"Only I understand your pain, Your Highness. You can open up to me."

"...I'll embrace it all for you."

"It's okay to be weak around me, big brother."

He'd be humiliated and furious if he knew, but among the women who left no impression on him was even Evangeline Ruth.

But contrary to their assumptions, Arpad wasn't some wounded soul.

His life was full of obstacles, but he had been born gripping even more advantages—perhaps twice as many. So he had no real dissatisfaction.

What bothered him was pity. Pity was an emotion several times more horrific than fear.

That was why Hilia intrigued him and drew his interest.

"Everyone's going to find out that Mercenary King Gerald is really Crown Prince Arpad."

She was the first woman to approach him knowing his secret who said something like that.

The first not to approach him with feigned compassion, promising to soothe his wounds like those kind, gentle types.

She even threatened me instead.

She'd said she'd expose his secret if he didn't go through with the bride abduction marriage.

She didn't pity him.

He hadn't realized it at the time, but he was quite satisfied with that fact.

She was truly one of a kind.

Being with her had let him experience emotions he'd never felt before in his life.

And yet, even now, Arpad didn't know what name to give his own feelings.

Not when he'd abducted Hilia.

Not when he'd kissed her and completed the marriage rite.

Not when they'd performed that absurd play together, or when he'd woken up beside her in the same bed.

Not even when his chest had boiled seeing the knight standing by her side.

Not even when his aunt had criticized the betrothal gifts and he'd stormed out on impulse.

In truth, it had been unnecessary.

There were no wedding rings or betrothal gifts prepared separately for them, but the palace servants in the annex where they'd held their marriage rite had laid out various jewels.

He'd picked a suitable ring from among them and slipped it onto Hilia's finger.

Right now, he just didn't want to call it a 'wedding ring.'

Arpad hadn't noticed what this all meant.

What force had driven him to this point.

Not even after hounding his subordinates to conquer the ruins in a week, rushing back without a moment's rest in that mad dash, and returning to her this very moment.

He must be the most foolish man in the world.

Seeing that ring in Hilia's hand finally made him realize it.

His precious season—his first blooming spring—had been encroached upon.

He was unmistakably jealous.

Jealousy was an emotion that couldn't exist without a foundational feeling beneath it.

Before, pink or purple had never really caught his eye.

But after meeting Hilia, seeing pink made him want to touch her hair.

And purple made him crave a kiss to her eyelids.

All these realizations seared into his soul like a branding iron.

The moment he saw the wedding ring Ludwig must have given her on Hilia's hand.

Without thinking, he bit out the words like crunching ice.

"You still have that?"

"Ah!"

Before Hilia could even respond, his hand moved first.

He snatched Ludwig's ring from her finger (that's what he called it).

Then he slipped the one he'd brought onto her left ring finger.

It fit her slender, smooth finger perfectly, as if it had been made for it from the start.

Finally, Arpad smiled.

It was the satisfaction of something returning to its rightful place.

He finally admitted it.

The emotion underlying that jealousy.

It had taken him so long to recognize it, since it was his first time feeling it.

For Arpad, who had always passed through the four seasons without emotion, spring would now be uniquely special.

Because of the woman he'd met in this spring.

The woman who reminded him of spring flowers was standing right before him.

The emotions he'd realized so late shone brilliantly from her hand.

Arpad finally acknowledged his love and bowed his head before it.

And he kissed the back of his love's hand.

Arpad suddenly slipped a ring onto Hilia's finger, then kissed the back of her hand.

He looked up and smiled...

Hilia stared at Arpad in shock.

What the hell? Why's he smiling like that?

It was a smile she'd never seen before.

The smiles she knew from Arpad fell into two categories.

1) A mocking sneer

2) The smile he wore while pondering how to kill someone

Of course, there were times she'd sensed a boyish smile from him.

But this expression? This was new.

A smile like the armor he'd worn so tightly around himself had crumbled, revealing the real Arpad hidden inside.

She was lost in that smile for quite a while.

Forgetting even about the ring that had been taken and the ornate light purple one now on her finger.

She snapped out of it only when she heard his uncharacteristically gentle question.

"Was everything alright while I was gone?"

"Uh, yeah?"

Hilia, who'd been entranced by Arpad, finally regained her senses.

And she hurriedly poured out the words she'd prepared countless times in his absence.

"Ah! D-don't worry. I handled everything perfectly. No one outside knows you were away!"

"That's not what I meant."

"Huh?"

"I was asking if you were alright."

"...Huh?"

"Did you eat well? Sleep well?"

"...Huh?"

At Hilia's dazed triple "Huh?", Arpad answered in a soft whisper.

"I was curious about how you were doing while I was away. Constantly. I was worried."

In the end, Hilia asked him sincerely.

"Did you eat something bad?"

This time, Arpad nearly responded with "What?"

After a moment of confusion, he remembered.

His usual way of speaking.

And Yuken's criticisms of it.

"I'm not exactly a nice guy, but listening to you makes me think I'm plenty kind."

"I need to watch myself. If anyone takes you as the standard, they'll get dumped dozens of times and die a lonely old bachelor."

And if Hilia had talked about work before, he would've said:

"If you didn't handle it that well, it'd be a problem."

Suddenly feeling the weight of his past karma, Arpad pressed a hand to his forehead.

Hilia jumped up and peered into his face.

"What's wrong? Are you really feeling sick?"

Her voice was filled with clear worry.

Those few simple words lifted Arpad's mood from rock bottom.

He laughed in disbelief at how strange his own change was.

It wasn't unreasonable for Hilia to react like this.

"No. I'm fine."

"Yeah, figured. You're not the type to get sick easily."

Hilia looked him up and down, then said,

"But where'd you go that has you dressed up so fancy? Did you meet a girlfriend or something?"

"......"

Arpad felt a little—no, extremely—aggrieved.

He'd just realized he loved her, and now she was asking if he'd been off cheating?

And it wasn't even said in a jealous or wary tone.

That fact grated on him more than anything.

I can't snap or get sarcastic here. Arpad Estrid.

Arpad was a quick learner.

Giving Hilia his trust had to come first.

He drew a smile that looked even kinder than before.

And he chose his words carefully. As soft and affectionate as possible.

No taunting or sarcasm.

"No. Girlfriend? I've told you a hundred times, I don't have one. Just a wife."

"...?"

Hilia's expression turned strange.

She circled around him, inspecting, then asked,

"You are Arpad, right?"

"No one else looks this artistically handsome. It's your husband, Arpad."

"...Seeing this shameless self-praise, you really are Arpad..."

Hilia looked genuinely confused.

"Why are you acting so weird? They say when people start doing things they never did before, death's knocking. It's scary."

Arpad felt momentarily lost.

Should he grieve that Hilia's trust in him was at rock bottom?

Or rejoice that she was worried about him dying?