Chapter 18

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Translator: Harry Potta

Chapter: 18

Chapter Title: Just Because

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"Why did you save me?"

The unfamiliar question drifted over the familiar aroma of rosemary tea.

Why was he suddenly curious about that?

Clodel lifted her head slightly to look at Kaiyan.

Beneath his disheveled black hair sweeping across his forehead, his sharp red eyes stared at her, as if demanding an answer.

Why did this man always look so angry?

Even now, his expression was cold, as if he had some grievance with her for calling him her benefactor and praising him.

"Just because."

"Just because?"

"Yes."

She hadn't saved him with any special meaning behind it.

Worrying about her body not healing was a concern for someone who had always been healthy.

Since she was on the verge of escaping the end of this life, she had grown indifferent to treatment or her physical condition.

"I would have saved anyone in that kind of danger."

"......Anyone?"

It wasn't because he was some noble duke.

If it had been Hanna with the alligator's jaws closing in, or even an unnamed gatekeeper at the castle, she would have thought it better for her—someone about to die soon—to be bitten instead of them, who still had full lives ahead.

But upon hearing her answer, Kaiyan's face grew even colder.

"To think the Duchess would have thoughts like that. You should have avoided the danger."

Clodel fell silent as she watched the man speak to her as if scolding her.

'If I had, you would have been the one bitten.'

Even if she said it, it felt like she wouldn't get a proper response.

"The most precious woman in this territory, and you have no sense of it."

Hadn't he come to express his gratitude?

Clodel couldn't understand why she was being reprimanded instead.

"The tea's not great anyway. I'm leaving."

Kaiyan abruptly stood up and left, exuding a chill aura.

Only then did Clodel, her tension easing, let out a sigh.

As the breath fully passed through her throat...

"Cough. Cough, cough."

A fit of coughing erupted, and Clodel quickly grabbed a napkin from the tea table to cover her mouth.

"Cough."

When the coughing finally subsided after a long while, something heavy and suffocating rose in her throat, as if she were about to vomit.

"Urk."

Only after spitting out a small clot of blood could Clodel finally calm down.

This was the end of her life.

Clodel had once vaguely imagined an ordinary deathbed.

With loving family by her side.

A husband with white hair, grown children whispering that they loved her and would never forget her as they saw her off.

No one faces death without fear.

And for her, preparing her heart alone, telling herself it was okay, waiting—it was too frightening and lonely.

When she saw her parents off, she learned that even such ordinary deaths weren't granted to everyone.

Still.

Still...

The only comfort for the rising sadness in her chest was the pain she had grown accustomed to enduring.

Kaiyan didn't visit Clodel for several days after that.

It was a different attitude from how, after she saved him and injured her leg, he had come to her bedroom multiple times a day to check on her, share tea, or have meals together.

"Anyone, she says?"

He was a man forged his entire life as a shield to protect others, a sword to be wielded for their sake.

Since he had never been the one protected, he might have placed too much meaning on her saving him.

But even just recalling how she had saved him made his chest feel warm and fuzzy—now that memory had faded into something trivial.

"Just because? That's all there is to it?"

There wasn't even a predetermined right answer, yet he couldn't understand why it irritated him so much.

Knock knock.

"Come in."

The butler reported to him.

"My lord, the repair on the jewel you entrusted is complete. The jeweler is here—what shall we do?"

"Send him in."

The jeweler entered with a beaming face full of delight at the increased business and bowed his head.

"I've repaired the ring you entrusted."

A blue-tinged jewel box was placed on his desk. He had handed over just the ring before, but now he wondered what Antyone had done with the original box. It should have contained a certificate from the ring's maker.

Shaking off the persistent thoughts, Kaiyan picked up the ring from the box.

"The gem is large, but Madam's fingers are very slender. So I made the ring as light as possible..."

The jeweler explained eagerly, but Kaiyan only vaguely understood and saw that the ring looked brand new anyway.

The thinned band made it look even more refined. It hardly felt like the same item.

Seeing the reborn blue diamond ring lifted Kaiyan's mood for a moment.

When it came from Antyone, it had a flaw, and he hadn't liked the idea of giving Clodel something involved in such an unsavory incident.

Now it felt like a completely different item, so it seemed fine to give it to her.

As soon as the jeweler left, he reverted to being the dissatisfied man.

Clodel was a truly difficult woman.

What on earth went through that small head of hers?

The problem was that once distance like this formed, it was hard to go back and visit her.

Other nobles had political marriages too—did they all live this awkwardly?

While living in the same house?

Kaiyan was puzzled, but he didn't have many friends to ask.

Most male nobles his age who had marched to war with him had fallen in battle.

Nobles invited each other to build connections, went hunting together.

When his father, Duke Temneth, was alive, Kaiyan had received many such invitations as father and son, but most of those families had lost their heads or heirs. Now, those connections had fizzled out.

So there was no one proper to ask how others lived.

"What's wrong, my lord? Is the item not to your liking?"

The butler ventured as he watched Kaiyan glare at the blue diamond.

"No. It's good. Better than I expected."

"Then why the long face? Some other worry?"

Right. A seasoned butler might offer some help.

Besides, this man was a longtime loyal retainer of House Temneth, holding the rank of baron.

Kaiyan didn't want to seem like he was fussing over Clodel, so he feigned calm and asked lightly.

"I asked Clodel why she saved me."

"I see. What did Madam say?"

"Just because."

The butler blinked.

"Not that I just asked casually—she said she saved me just because."

"Ah."

Finally grasping the context, the butler nodded.

"Does that make sense? She could have lost the ability to walk forever. To save someone for such a trivial reason and get hurt instead."

"Madam has a gentle nature."

"She said she would have saved anyone."

"How fortunate to have such a lady as our Madam. She'll surely show mercy if the territory's people fall into hardship."

"True. That's a point."

The biggest issue with political marriages was not knowing someone's true character.

"At least she's certain to treat the territory's people well."

Unless Rowen's people spat at her for being a Vermonte.

"Sigh."

As he let out an uncharacteristic sigh, the butler asked again.

"What is it now?"

"I just can't figure it out. Is getting close to one's wife always this hard?"

Kaiyan had never cared about the butler's marriage before, but now he was curious.

"It was a sudden marriage. Usually, even in political unions, there's an engagement period of about a year for courtship before the wedding."

"Right."

"Isn't it because you skipped the courtship?"

"Courtship?"

As Kaiyan asked in genuine confusion, the butler cleared his throat awkwardly.

"Ahem. Well, until now, you've only met Madam in the bedroom, haven't you?"

"That's true."

It was because he loathed the sight of a Vermonte and felt pressured to fulfill his duty to produce an heir. If he didn't cooperate with the king's marriage decree, it would be seen as disloyalty to the crown.

He'd never thought to see her anywhere else.

Her bedroom.

And his own. Just once.

"You need time to get to know each other. You don't know her well yet."

Kaiyan, who had been inwardly mulling that he had no idea what Clodel thought or did, nodded in agreement.

"What do people usually do during courtship?"

"Various activities, or dates."

"Doesn't that sound like groveling desperately to a woman?"

The butler shut his mouth.

Kaiyan found women who clung to him annoying. Perhaps heaven had given him this aloof wife as a match. Now he was the one fidgeting.

"Spending time together will help you understand her better."

The butler decided to subtly advise his master for the sake of House Temneth's succession.

"How about a picnic?"

"A picnic?"

"Yes. Madam has trouble walking, so a stroll might be too much. She's been cooped up in the castle—must be stifling."

Kaiyan had thought the same, which was why he'd tried to show her his bedroom.

"Prepare that. I can give her the ring there too."

"When do you plan to go?"

"Now."

Watching Kaiyan head off to change without delay, the butler sent a servant to Madam's room and went to the kitchen.

Thanks to the capable butler's advice, an hour later, Kaiyan was walking the flower path with Clodel in his arms.

The rear garden of Rowen Castle bordered a small lake and was the lord's private land.

No one entered, and the gardeners only kept the overgrowth in check, giving it a vivid wild feel without artificiality.

As he carefully set her down under the tree shade as the butler had prepared, Clodel—who had looked pale and unwell today—seemed a bit better already.

'I thought it was because I suggested going out together.'

He nearly got upset again, but the sight of the woman sitting in the field of blooming white margarets was quite captivating, so he plopped down beside her.

"How is it? Like it?"

"Yes. I love it."

Kaiyan kept eyeing for an opportunity.

When to give her the ring?

Was there something he could say to improve the mood?

But he still didn't know what to say to a woman whose tastes he didn't know.

"Tell me if there's anything you want. Anything."

Clodel gazed at him quietly.

"Since you saved my life. As repayment."

Oh no. He should have said he'd give her the ring as repayment for saving his life.

If Antyone hadn't stolen it from the corridor that day, he wouldn't be agonizing like this.

"Will you really grant any request?"

"Yeah."

"Anything I say?"

"Yes."

Clodel smiled faintly.

But Kaiyan, seeing even that slight smile for the first time, felt his breath catch unwittingly.

"I'll think about it."

Why did even those words feel so endearing?

Watching his serene-faced wife sitting there made his heart complicated again.

He stood up, plucked some of the abundant white flowers, and made a small bouquet.

"Here. Take it."

It was a big gesture for a woman who still couldn't walk due to her leg.

"Thank you."

But as Clodel sniffed the flowers, her face twisted.

"Why..."

As he startled and leaned in to check on her...

"Cough. Cough."

Blood seeped between her fingers as she covered her mouth.

"Clodel!"

Unable to breathe properly, she collapsed, splattering blood onto the white petals clutched in her arms.