Chapter 38

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Translator: Harry Potta

Chapter Title: Chapter 38

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Translator: Harry Potta

Chapter 9. The Perpetrator Forgets Quickly (1)

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From the day he heard the news that Genevieve had been attacked, Edelaine was clearly not herself.

She wandered around searching for someone, or paced anxiously as if being chased.

Even back then, Edelaine had been much the same.

He suspected she might be trying to run away again, but there was no sign of it. On the contrary, her demeanor had grown far more compliant. She let him keep watch over her as if she had no choice in the matter, and she even seemed not entirely displeased by it.

Shane deliberately pretended not to notice, but he never let his guard down.

Why was she being so compliant? Did she truly pity him?

Fearing she might vanish while he slept, there were nights when he clutched her tightly, only to wake midway and stare at her for what felt like ages. Each time, Edelaine would reach out in her sleep and gently pat his head.

Damn it all—Shane crumbled so easily under that feather-light touch.

He had become utterly powerless against someone so fragile he could kill her without even clenching his fist. And worst of all, he loved it. He spent every dawn tossing and turning, secretly hoping the sleeping Edelaine would be the one to embrace him first.

And yet he had sworn he'd given up on ever being loved.

Every time Edelaine closed her eyes as if resigned to being held by him, or leaned into his body, hope sprouted like weeds.

Maybe, just maybe, if enough time passed like this, her pity might turn into something more—maybe she'd come to like him a little.

"Ugh... sob."

Edelaine swallowed her sobs. As she rubbed her tear-streaked cheeks against his shoulder and clung to him, Shane's breath caught in his throat with every shaky inhale she took.

You have no idea what you look like when you cry like this.

The young Edelaine had cried loudly, as if stealing away Shane's very emotions. She was the type to wear her feelings openly.

She never cried like this—biting her lips until they bled, as if enduring some festering wound deep inside.

Seeing her like this for the first time tore at his heart; he had no idea what to do. Shane could only pull her closer.

He couldn't even bring himself to tell her not to cry.

What in the world had happened to her?

What could be driving her to such agony?

My colors, my emotions. My soul.

If only she'd tell him. If she'd just ask for help once, Shane would do anything.

But Edelaine never asked for help. Not ever.

Five years ago, she'd been the same. Even when her suffering was plain as day, she never once voiced a complaint.

And yet she'd extend her hand without hesitation to a man she didn't love, just because he pitifully clung to her and played the part.

Even with a face blackened as if on the verge of death, if he cried and begged, she couldn't bring herself to be truly cold. Oblivious to the dangerous hope that single scrap of pity ignited in him.

Were you crying alone like this back then, too?

Shane stroked her slender back, hoping it might bring her even a sliver of comfort.

Exhausted from crying, Edelaine had collapsed into a deep sleep.

Shane laid her in bed, and Lloyd tended to her with practiced ease—fluffing the pillow lower and pulling the covers over her. Then he fixed Shane with a straight look.

His blank expression seemed almost ordinary at a glance, but a closer inspection revealed neatly defined features. After studying Shane's face for a moment, Lloyd let out a deflating chuckle.

"Your face is downright murderous."

"……."

"The lady really ought to see this."

Instead of dignifying the impudence with a reply, Shane swept a hand through his hair. He didn't need a mirror to know what he looked like.

"If she saw this side of you, she'd have believed me ages ago when I said you were insane."

"I'm still perfectly sane."

"Doesn't your definition of sane differ from everyone else's?"

"You really don't yield a single inch, do you? Pick that up from Edelaine?"

"Probably. There's only one person worth watching and learning from."

Like it or not, Edelaine was Lloyd's one and only.

"Does she ever..."

Shane scowled.

"...say 'help me' to you?"

"You've seen how spoiled she gets, haven't you? Soon as her mouth opens, it's 'do this for me, do that, I can't live without you...'"

"……."

Lloyd quirked the corner of his mouth.

"Ah, but she wouldn't say that to you."

"You little shit."

"If glares could kill, I'd have dropped dead the day she dragged me home. Pity."

Lloyd flashed a rare, genuine grin. Edelaine would've clapped in delight and declared it a holiday worthy of celebration.

Unlike Edelaine—who'd scooped up a street rat out of pure, oblivious charity—Shane had seen right through Lloyd's origins and nature from the start.

Shane had tried repeatedly to pry Lloyd away from her side. Who in their right mind would keep an assassin-trained child near their most precious person?

In the end, though, he couldn't defy her will. Every attempt failed.

Lloyd felt much the same. He'd called Shane crazy over and over, hoping she would finally keep her distance.

"Don't play games. You know better than anyone that I can't lay a hand on you."

"You're the one tormenting my lady. Suck it up."

Words he'd never dare utter in front of Edelaine. She even hated him calling her "lady."

"Aren't you turning in? Want me to fetch your nightclothes?"

"The mere thought of you waiting on me makes my stomach turn. ...Just stand guard for a bit."

The man who despised everyone but Edelaine sure had a mouth on him.

To Lloyd's eyes, Shane bordered on outright people-hating. He cared for exactly one soul—who paid him no mind—while strangers fawned over him endlessly. No wonder it grated. Cling too hard to the disinterested, and hate was inevitable.

Lloyd shot a glance at Shane's irritable retreating back as he stormed out of the bedroom, then turned to the soundly sleeping Edelaine.

How the hell did she end up taming that?

And suffering for it.

By the time Lloyd met Edelaine, Shane was already like this.

Lucian dubbed him a demon, but to Lloyd, he was something far worse.

Without that thing in her life, Edelaine could've had a far smoother path.

No need to recklessly abandon everything and hole up in some rundown shack.

No need to get caught like this and suffer.

Shane undoubtedly thought the same whenever he looked at her.

Why'd she have to tame that one? Anything would've been better...

But unlike Shane, Lloyd was bound by a solemn promise.

"Come with me. I'll be your home. I swear I won't abandon you."

Why had those trite words hooked him so?

Even dismissing her as someone who couldn't keep promises, Lloyd had grasped her hand like a man possessed. In that instant, she'd seemed divine. Break it, and kill me.

Yet here they were, eight years later, and Edelaine had never once left him behind—no matter what.

Even fleeing the capital, casting off everything, she'd taken him along.

"I'd have died ages ago without you," she'd whine, but Lloyd knew full well she could've managed everything on her own.

Edelaine was the type who could survive just fine without help. Leave her be, and she'd figure it out.

She didn't need to drag him on the run. Didn't need to live with him for five years. When he'd asked why, she'd stared at him like he'd posed the world's dumbest question.

"Because that's what we promised."

Lloyd gazed down at Edelaine and sighed. Her eyes were red and puffy from all the crying. They'd swell up tomorrow for sure. He'd need to fetch some ice.

To Lloyd, Edelaine was his sole master, his parent, his sibling.

She embodied every bond the world had to offer. He believed he'd been born solely to serve some purpose for her.

He had no clue what thoughts churned in her head or why she was like this. And he didn't need to know.

As long as she kept her promise. As long as she never left him behind.