Chapter 86

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Translator: Harry Potta
Chapter: 86
Chapter Title: The Scent of Tobacco
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After she finished speaking, Aileen bit the inside of her cheek. She had spoken so freely, presuming to know Cesare’s mind. A belated worry crept in—had she been too forward?
Not daring to look him in the face, she lowered her gaze. Anxiously gauging his reaction, she tried to gently release his hand. But before their hands could part, Cesare gripped hers tightly once more.
His grip was rather rough. Aileen flinched in surprise, and he immediately loosened his hold. It was much gentler, but he still didn't let go.
They stood for a while, just holding hands. Then, a damp drop touched her cheek. Drip. Drip. Soon, the air was filled with rain. She had thought the day was overcast, and now, it had begun to rain again.
Fortunately, it wasn’t a downpour like the day before. A light drizzle pattered through the leaves. Slowly, Cesare and Aileen began to get wet.
Yet neither of them suggested going back inside the mansion. They simply stood there, under the orange tree.
How long had they been standing there? Cesare let out a low sigh and released Aileen’s hand. Instead, he took out a handkerchief, pressed it into her palm, and shrugged off his uniform jacket. Then he draped it over her head.
Enveloped by the large jacket, Aileen looked up at him. Cesare wiped his wet face with the back of his hand and said,
“Go on inside.”
But Aileen shook her head.
“I want to stay by your side, Cesare.”
He gestured with his chin toward the marks on her neck and asked,
“Even after this?”
“Yes.”
Seeing Aileen’s complete refusal to back down, Cesare swallowed a dry laugh. He then said, as if to coax her,
“It’s because of the cigarette.”
He adjusted the uniform jacket over her head, implying she should go in before the smell reached her. Aileen clutched his jacket and handkerchief tightly and asked,
“It’s alright. Can’t I stay here with you?”
“…”
“I want to see you smoke, too.”
Ever since she was a child, Aileen had enjoyed observing plants. She observed them closely and recorded her findings in detail, but there was, in fact, another subject that held an even greater interest for her than plants.
It was Cesare.
Since the day she met him, Cesare had been the most fascinating subject in Aileen’s world. Every time they met, she would meticulously record every new fact she learned about him in her diary.
She wanted to know more about the Cesare she didn't know. She wanted to delve deeper into the sense of unfamiliarity she felt when she saw him smoking today.
But there was another, more desperate feeling, even greater than her desire to observe a new side of Cesare.
*I don’t want to leave Cesare alone.*
Yesterday, and again today, Cesare had seemed so fragile. Like a man who had turned a blade upon himself. The thought of wanting to protect a man who feared nothing in this world was so absurd that she couldn't say it out loud, but right now, she wanted to be by his side.
*He keeps saying such strange things…*
She knew he wasn't the type to be shaken by something like a dream, which only worried her more. It didn't matter to her that Cesare had killed her in his dream. She was already resolved to give her life for him in reality, so what did it matter if she died a few times in a dream?
She wanted to tell Cesare her thoughts, but she was afraid he would scold her, so she couldn't bring herself to speak. She just stood there quietly, waiting for his answer.
When Aileen showed no sign of going inside and simply continued to look up at him, Cesare’s brow furrowed. He pulled her closer under the leaves to shield her from the rain, then took a new cigarette from his coat, lit it, and muttered,
“My mistake.”
With a soft hiss, a red ember sparked at the tip of the cigarette. Holding it between his fingers, he said,
“I should have taught you to be wary of me.”
Cesare narrowed his eyes and looked at Aileen. Aileen silently retorted that it wouldn't have worked even if he had. Of course, she didn't say this out loud either.
He then smoked in silence. Aileen stood obediently by his side. Only the pitter-patter of raindrops on the leaves continued.
His black hair, soaked with rain, clung to his pale skin. With his eyes downcast and an indifferent expression, the man smoking the cigarette would occasionally turn his head to the side to exhale.
Each time, Aileen would wrinkle her nose. It was a harsh smell, but because it was Cesare, it seemed okay. When Ornella smoked, it had been nothing but unpleasant.
On this rainy night, as she watched Cesare smoking under the orange tree as if mesmerized, she asked without thinking,
“Can I try it?”
Cesare, in the middle of smoking, let out a scoff of disbelief.
“What, do you want to copy everything I do?”
“That’s not it, but…”
She had expected a firm refusal, but surprisingly, he didn't say no. Instead, Cesare placed the cigarette he was smoking between Aileen’s lips.
Aileen, a cigarette suddenly in her mouth, blinked. He offered no explanation, so, not knowing any better, she took a deep drag. And then burst into a fit of violent coughs.
Inhaling the acrid smoke all at once brought tears to her eyes. As she coughed, her face turning crimson, he pressed the cigarette into an ashtray, extinguishing it. He took back the handkerchief he had given her and wiped her coughing lips, saying,
“You had to experience it for yourself. Now you won't dare try it again.”
The words were cruel, but Aileen thought she understood why Cesare had done it. It must have been his way of warning her that not everything he gave her was good.
Cesare made no attempt to hide his intentions; he laid them bare for even the unperceptive Aileen to see.
Aileen looked up at Cesare, her eyes welling with tears. Cesare gazed down at her.
Their eyes held for a long moment. Suddenly, Aileen thought that she was completely surrounded by Cesare. His clothes, the smoke from his cigarette, and the mark he had left on her neck… all of it enveloped her.
Under the large, generous jacket that shielded her from the rain, Aileen’s lips parted slightly.
“Cesare.”
Meeting his red gaze, she whispered in a hoarse voice.
“I know you may not find me dependable, but I’ll do my best. So…”
A faint pain throbbed in her neck. Aileen swallowed hard, pushing the pain down. She endured the ache and continued,
“If there is anything at all I can do to help, please tell me.”
If only she could take his suffering for herself. With this fervent wish, she looked at Cesare, her eyes pleading.
The crimson of his eyes was vivid even in the darkness. They held an otherworldly light, feeling not quite human, as if they were spears ready to pierce her heart. Aileen unknowingly held her breath, waiting for his answer.
At some point, a faint smile touched Cesare’s lips. He tugged at the jacket Aileen was wearing. With a soft thud, it fell to the rain-soaked ground. He paid no mind to the uniform, now sullied with muddy water, and cupped Aileen’s cheeks with both hands.
Then, he leaned down and gently pressed his lips to hers. Enveloped by the sound of the rain, their kiss continued under the orange tree. Aileen closed her eyes and shared the kiss with him.
After a few moments of a tender kiss, Cesare slowly pulled away. He licked his wet lips and stared at Aileen with an intense gaze.
The man, drenched in rain, exuded a dangerously alluring aura. For some reason, his red eyes seemed even more vivid than before.
“For you to learn to be wary…”
The corners of his eyes curved slightly. Cesare lowered his voice and whispered to Aileen,
“I’ll have to do something much worse.”